Fun on the Faris funny farm

Thank you, Mom, for the title of my blog today. I really wish that I could blog about any and everything, but since this is public knowledge, I have to keep some of my stories for phone conversations. Mate, I'm sorry for not returning your call, I'll call you tomorrow. So, I have this recurring problem. Sometimes when I get upset or angry about something, I overcompensate by becoming a rock star (aka drinking too much). I talked to Bren about this and she said that her usual reaction is to just stop drinking and go home if she has an altercation with someone. For me, my inner voice tells me that I am actually a 200 pound man who can metabolize much more alcohol than my real life body. My inner voice says something like this, "You'll show him/her! Drink more mojitos!". My inner voice is an idiot. So, I give into the inner voice and live the rest of my evening "showing" the person that usually isn't even present at that point. Hmmm, stupid inner voice! Anyway, I'm recovering from one of those overcompensating nights and I think I've had a lightbulb moment. And when I really think about what it was that I had the trailer park argument about in the street, I'm embarrassed that it was even worthy of me a) getting upset and b) choosing to act like an 18 year old freshman. Lessons learned: 1) Don't lose sunglasses that don't belong to you. 2) If you find yourself upset and angry with boy, go home immediately. 3) Don't go to Waffle House after 5 glasses of wine, 1 vodka tonic, and 3 mojitos. 4) I am not superwoman.