Merry Mate is getting murrrried!!!

Meet "Merry Mate". Her name is Sarrin and she is the blonde in the pink tube top. She's getting murrrried on June 10th. I want to set you all up for the next few weeks in the lives of the mates. Prof is even going with us, so this blog will be sittin' pretty between June 7-12th. WE'RE DRIVING TO SOUTH FLORIDA FOR SARRIN'S WEDDING!!! Yes, Alison and I will be bridesmaids in Sarrin and Rob's (Robby in his real estate/family world) wedding in Marco Island, FL and Aaron ("Ron", my nickname for him) will be along for the ride. Or hopefully the drive because we'll be taking turns driving. So, Sarrin orders us these super expaaaansive bridesmaid dresses (I'm ok with her reading this because I bitched from day 1 about the price.) and of course the piece of fabric doesn't fit my super unique body. Does yours fit, Mate? I keep forgetting to ask you, all those millions of times we've talked lately. Ha. Mate and blog readers, I'm here to tell you, Bessie at Bessie's Alterations on Milledge SET A GIRLFRIEND UP! Putting on my altered dress today was like slipping on Cinderella's slipper. Bad analogy. Continuemos. I'm pumped about all kinds of other things like the fact that there will be so many fun Furman people like: Erik, Smitty, Hunter, and Spurgeon...who are ALL riding down together, I might add. A very hot carload, in my opinion. :) We're going to be at the beach! It'll be like college. My girfriends and I hanging out with all the Sigma Chi's at the beach, having way too much to drink, etc. Circa Beach Weekend 2001, Jekyll Island, GA "Get It Right". Yes I still wear the tee shirt. It's hot. I'm looking over at my bulletin board of pictures and I'm thinkin' I HAVE to scan in a picture of the MATES at one of the Sigma Chi beach weekends we went on at Furman. Nevermind my headband, ok?!

I am not responsible for my actions between the days of June 7th and June 11th. Amen.

-Faris

Single woman; big world.

So, timing is a bitch. As many of you in blogworld know, Aaron's mom recently underwent major surgery in the form of a kidney transplant. Aaron went out to Albuturkey, NM and stayed with his mom for a week and then came back home to Charlotte, NC. Now, like I said before this was major surgery and she was out of commission for well...she is still out of commission. So, a couple days ago his mom calls him and says that his dad passed out at work and is heading to the hospital. I know, I know, WTF? So, we come to find out that his dad is having surgery to remove a lemon sized tumor from his stomach. (the surgery has passed and we are 99.7% sure that it wasn't cancerous). But damn, people, how much more could that timing suck? You gotta feel bad for this family, like my momma always says, when it rains it pours. So, Aaron has gone back out West to help out his family once again, he is such a great son!! So, that leads me to the title of this blog. We just found out Aaron was leaving yesterday so here I am in Charlotte in somewhat shock since my boyfriend has left me for a week at the least. So, this has been my day of being a single, white, female. Wake up, take Aaron to the airport at the buttcrack of dawn. go home and go back to sleep until 10:00. Get up, take a shower, try to make coffee with a wonkey coffee machine. Take Bella to the park and tell everyone and their mom that she is 3 months old and she is a cocker spaniel. Go home. Eat some cereal. Watch True Hollywood Story about people you could care less about. Go to Pilates at 2:00. Go to the grocery store and go back to my apartment to get some clothes/essentials (I can't stay at my apartmente because my roomate has turned into Chucky). Go over to Aaron's empty apt. Play with Bella. Watch more THS of people you don't care about. Make dinner which consists of leftover merlot and Edy's light ice cream. I would call my friends but they are all gone since it's a holiday weekend. More or less, since I've been in a relationship for the past year and a half I make plans for "we" and not "me". I've forgotten how to be single. Regardless of my melodrama; whomever you believe in God, Buddha, the Dalai Lama, or Hulk Hogan please pray for Aaron's family cause they sure as heck need it. Amen and Amen.

-Alison

Tasty Florez

Tonight I went to see Florez play at Tasty World in Athens. It's a really cool bar where lots of fun small bands come and play. I always have fun when I go there. Last time Florez came in town, which was like, maybe 3 months ago, they played at Tasty World. It's hard though, because both times they've played on weeknights, this particular one being a summer weeknight where there aren't many students in town. Only a few avid fans showed up for the show, including some Furmanites...but not many (James Kilpatrick and Brian Tickner)! It's always super weird to me...well, always meaning these 2 times...anyway, it's weird to me to be at a Florez concert without my Mate and Spurgeon and everyone that I typically associate with those concerts. I was telling Erik about my feelings on this and he didn't seem to understand. See, he's been with Florez way past Furman and that's where I have them stuck. I think of Homecoming out on the mall rocking to Alex and the band and hearing them at the Handelbar. Florez + Athens = Bizarre. By the way, check out Florez at www.florezmusic.com. Oh, and the boys are hot. Sizzlin' hot.

Side story: on our way home (right after fearing that the cop behind us was going to pull me, even though I was dead sober), Charlsie, Bren and I saw a car in front of us swerving. MAJORLY SWERVING. It was so scary that we followed it up Barnett Shoals Road. After watching this swerving and driving extremely slowly/then quickly, we made the executive decision to call the cops. Probably sensing us stalking them, the car pulled into an apt. complex. We left, hoping that the cops would take it from there. I'm not one to tattle, but guys, this was serious. I would never want anyone I know or love to be in a car anywhere near this guy/girl. All in a hard day's work.

-Faris

"Little Pink penises for you and me..."

Saturday was quite the event for yours truly, my first true bachelorette party. Yeah, I've been to a few "bachelorette parties" but they all were GAY so I'll have to give props to this one. I mean, what could be either more fun or more obnoxious (you choose) than 10 girls in matching pink tank tops that say "Kate's bachelorette party" all carrying around penis straws and a big inflatable penis? Well, I for one, had a great time and give props to the party planners, Jackie and Katie. Anyway, the day started off with us looking all angelic for a true, Southern, wedding shower. Enclosed is the first picture of the day. Pretty soon we left lovely bumfreak Clover, SC and headed to the hottest of hot spots, Charlotte, NC. Soon, the lovely two girls that were above morphed into pink tank top wearing FREAKS and cared about nothing more than taking shots and drinking out of penis straws. In one of the bars there was a cover band singing a John Mellancamp tune and he oh so aptly changed the words to match our theme of the night, and this is when Kate started dancing like this.
Oh and also inspired the title of this blog. There were at least 6 or 7 other bachelorette parties out that night but they were all drinking their HATERADE and muttering underneath their breath they couldn't believe that we got shirts, cause that was too much work. All I have to say is, whatever. You only get one chance to celebrate one of your girlfriends getting married and get the chance to parade a big penis around uptown.

-Alison

Hey blog! Ya miss me!?

I went to a bridal shower this weekend for one of my co-workers from East Paulding Middle School, where I used to teach for two years (2003-2005). My friend is getting married and the shower was full of people that I worked very closely with for two whole years. BUT...I couldn't remember their names?!?! I mean, what is that all about? I walked in and completely blanked. Of course they knew me since I was 30 minutes late and made my entrance to say the least, but nobody did me the favor of reminding me of any names. I was like a circus freak to all of them because 1) I couldn't remember anyone's names and who has a baby or two babies or is divorced and 2)I'm not married...oh yea and 3)I don't have kids. Gawking at my empty left hand and quasi-flat stomach. While they talked about the best play groups around, I daydreamed about what part of town I wanted to go out in that night.

I don't really have any good stories from this weekend! I just wrote a long paper, so I think I've drained all my creative juices. More to come, blog, more to come.

Sleepwalking

I sleepwalk. Sleeptalk. And sleepscream. However, I haven't sleptwalked (to my knowledge) in the past few years until last night. Now, yes, I have woken up with random items of clothing in my bed or woken up lying on the wrong end of the bed, but I haven't had one of the scary experiences in awhile. Last night at 1 AM (1 hour after going to bed), I apparently, bounded out of bed, walked down the stairs, looked at my sister and when asked, "what are you doing?", I copped an attitude and walked over to the front door to look out the window. Clearly. Then, I started walking through the den, all the while she is making a crazy "what the hell is going on?" face, and I suddenly stopped and asked her, "Is it the middle of the night or something?". She begins interrogating me, "Are you awake? Are you sleepwalking?". I insisted upon being awake and sometime during this discussion I actually woke up. I was confused, started to giggle, then went back to bed. I tell you: I would NEVER have remembered this incident had Brende not brought it to my attention on my facebook wall that I read the next morning.

Other funny sleep stories. When I was probably about 9 or 10, I sleptwalked out of my cabin at summer camp and happened to pass by my counselor on her way back from her evening meeting. She carried on a conversation with me that made no sense and walked me back to the cabin. Who knows where I was going? I had NO recollection of that experience. She was terrified and put a bell on the cabin door from then on. #2 The first night that MATE (AKA the other person that shares this blog with me) and I stayed in our freshman dorm room, apparently I got up and wandered around the room. When she politely asked me what I was doing, I began yelling at her to "SHUT UP!!". Way to make a first impression. The following year, our sophomore year, I bounded out of my top bunk, turned on the lights and insisted that there were "spiders everywhere!...can't you see them?!". That was one of those that I woke up and realized the ridiculousness of it as the "spiders" slowly disappeared from my vision.

Believe me, there are more stories. Mom, how many times did I come in y'all's room ranting about some dream or wake up on the couch downstairs? Got any good stories, any of you friends of mine?

Quote of the week

So, as many of you know the season finale of Gray's Anatomy was Sunday and Monday nights. My boyfriend and I watched it both nights and after all was said and done he was very upset that McDreamy had sex with Meredith, mostly because Meredith is not hot. So, the quote of the week is "Having sex with Meredith would be like having sex with an old, wrinkly, Olson twin."

That's funny right there.
-Alison

Mi carro nuevo

Folks, I bought my first car. I did it. It was slightly an impulse buy and slightly pre-meditated. Premeditated in the sense that I have been planning on buying a car with better gas mileage for my commute to and from Grayson High School. Impulse in the sense that I wasn't planning on buying it until later this summer when I actually had an income. Regardless, the car buying "bug" got me on Monday, May 8th after having lunch with my dad. He basically told me that my Lexus SUV was a ticking time bomb as well as a money pit and that I should quickly get rid of it before it breaks down and I have to put tons of money in it. So, he called his guy, Evan, at Acura of Greenville, who I met over at Honda. Within an hour, I had test driven my car (I was the first person to even test drive it!), had my old car appraised, numbers figured and presented to me...and eventually I had bought a car! It is a white 2006 Honda Accord EX. It has all the bells and whistles that I can't live without like leather, sunroof, and built in XM radio. The greatest part about my new car is the gas mileage. I was getting 17.5 miles to the gallon on a really good day in my SUV. Now I'll be getting as much as 35 miles to the gallon on the highway in my Accord. Unbelievable. Do you like your car? Why?

Lunch lady Doris...

Hello my friends. Here I sit behind the computer, property of Gwinnett County Public Schools. Today I have the biggest sense of dread. I have to buy school lunch. Usually, the night before I commute to Grayson HS, I prepare marvelous lunches. They are complete with snacks for the morning (a banana and graham crackers with peanut butter), an entree for lunch (a sandwich, soup, left overs, or a lean cuisine), a tasty dessert, and a fruit snack for the afternoon (grapes or peaches). Well, last night I had the pleasure of having dinner and spending the night in Lawrenceville with my friends Casey and Gary. Good news: I didn't have to commute this morning. Bad news: I have no lunch and no snacks! So, this morning during one of my classes, I sent a girl to get me some food from "Rampage", the school store. She came back with Combos and M&Ms. Wow, what a healthy snack. Thanks Rebecca. So, I've polled my 5th period class and they say that my best bet for school lunch is pizza or soup. They say the "International" line is questionable. However, my real fear isn't the food. I'm scared of the actual buying of the lunch. Do I cut in line because I'm faculty? How many sides of food am I allowed to take? If I take too many, will the lunch lady slap my hand because I look young enough to be in high school? Do I pay cash or do I have to type in some number into a machine? What is my number?! Lord help me!!!

Seis de Mayo

That's right beotches, seis is the new cinco. Cinco de mayo is way too mainstream for me and my homies, thus, our new favorite friend Ed and two moxican lesbians decided to have a seis de mayo party. It was a pretty good time. My favorite girl, Kristin, at the left, is always a good time at any party. You can always count on someone to drink too much and be a little inappropriate, and that's Kristin. I think she has a secret crush on Aaron. Last night she told me that even though she knew me before she met Aaron, she was sure about Aaron way sooner than she was about me. That's alright, I have a hard exterior so I don't have to be everyone's friend, right mate? So, Ed has two big dogs and we felt bad leaving little Bella at home for an afternoon. So, with Ed's permission of course, we went back and picked up Bella and let her play with the big dogs. The two moxicans cooked up some good moxican eats and some partook in some moxican green. Not me of course. Ew. But, to each their own I guess.

--Alison

Twinsies

I got to see my darling, baby twins yesterday. It was amazing. I used to nanny for them last summer and fall and then I had to quit so that I could student teach this spring. Anyway, I hadn't seen them since December, so you can imagine how much they have grown and improved in the time since I last saw them. They will be 2 in July. It's ABSOLUTELY amazing to me how quickly children learn things. For example, since I last saw Haleigh and Hannah, they have learned to reach the doors and open them. And let me tell you, they are experts. The Bakers now have those plastic things around the door knobs so that the girls won't go everywhere in the house. When I was there in December, the problem was them getting into the cabinets (hence the cabinet stoppers). They don't use their pacifiers anymore. Now, I'll tell you what. That got on my nerves. Yes, I understand that they have 3 kids under the age of 3, but seriously. Pacifiers and they are 1 and a half? Well, now they only use them at nap time. What hasn't changed? That Haleigh loves me the most. That Hannah's sweet little face might be the cutest thing I've ever seen. That walking round and round the outside of the house looking for rocks to put in sandpails doesn't get old EVER when you have two pea sized twin girls in tow. I love teaching high school, but there is nothing like some TLC of babies!

A bunch of monkeys throwing peanuts down an alley

So, last night Aaron and I went bowling with some friends. It depends on my mood but sometimes I get really competitive when I bowl and other nights I don't care at all. I think last night was one of those times. First of all, there were a ton of people there, at least 20 and you know how long it takes for that many people to get organized and get their beer and then get into teams, blah blah blah. So I decided to goof around as evidenced by the pic below. Aaron, on the other hand, loves to bowl and even has his own shoes and ball. No. I am not kidding. Sometimes I can't believe it either. But, it's true my friends, it's true. AND, not only does he have his own shoes, they look like special shoes, not really bowling shoes. I think that might be indicative of Aaron....if you look carefully you can see them in the pic.

HUMP DAY

That's right. I'm back. I'm feeling a little bit under the weather this week so I'm staying home to get some rest before I start pounding the street again to drum up some business. Last week at the conference in the PTC, Georgia they worked us so hard that I'm kind of semi exhausted. So, anyway, my all time favorite band, Pearl Jam, has a new cd that came out yesterday. Now, I will definitely go and buy it because I've bought every single one of their cds since I was about 12 or 13. Now...we all know that Pearl Jam is not a high profile band anymore but has more of a cult following I guess...Anyway, whenever I tell someone they're my favorite band they look at me kind of funny like...okay, how old are they like 50? so that led me to thinking, are they really my favorite band or do I just have loyalty to them. So, then that led me to thinking that I'm that way about everything. For example, I only buy clothes from Banana Republic. I only have Kate Spade purses. I only wear 7 jeans. Am I limiting myself to being such a brand snob? Maybe, maybe not. Banana Republic clothes fit me well because I have a small upper body completed by a bedunky-dunk lower half. So, that makes sense. The Kate Spade purses and 7 jeans might be a little over the top but it's like once you have the real thing, why go back to something that's not as nice? I would enjoy comments. Thanks. Oh, the pic above is perfect example of all three brands together. 7 jeans, KS purse and BR jacket. I'm obsessed. Please help.